Sunday, November 24, 2013

White Dudes

Christmas is coming! Bust out the John Denver jams, give yourself an excuse to get fat, and hit up k-mart once a day! Even through my cynicism and jesting, I really do love Christmas. I do not appreciate the capitalistic Christmas, but I do love the traditional, heart-warming, cookie-eating, tree decorating one of my childhood. The one factor that really busts my button though is the man himself: Santa. A supposedly jolly white obese man with magical powers. Really? We couldn't be more creative than this?

What I would like to know is why white dudes get all the credit? It's like Santa is some CEO of a major corporation, using his elves as slave-labor (do they even get paid?), taking all the credit for the hard work and love of parents all over the world. Give me a fuckin break here! And don't even get me started on God!

So here is my real conundrum: Ben really wanted our child to experience the "magic" of Santa like he did. I was raised on the truth that Santa did not exist. I think both are a bit extreme. I am creating a new fable....

"Santa" is really a Cooperative; a diverse community. Each area has their own Santa that collaborates with parents. Some are male, some female, some black, Native, Hispanic. There are gay and lesbian Santas, transgendered, Bisexual. There are a variety of people representing the magic of Christmas. It is still technically a lie, but I believe a better one. And your gifts are not based on whether you are "good" or "bad". What child is truly bad at heart? Your gifts are given just because you are here, experiencing life. Life is hard sometimes and we all deserve to celebrate on occasion, even if we made mistakes throughout the year.

So, this will be my fable to pass on to Benny. Many will not approve. I don't care. I am ready to change the patriarchal, one dimensional views of our current society....and I am starting with Santa.


  1. I don't see how someone could fault you for perpetuating your own lie over another more traditional, collective lie.

    Lie correctly, damn it!